Relationship Issues

When you're in a fight it can be so hard to figure out what to do. I find that inaction makes me go a little bananas. I really want to fix things, and it's taken me some time to realize what positive conflict resolution looks like. When I don't give myself enough time to chill out, I find that I am overly reactive and make the situation worse. For that reason, I like to sit with my problem and think about my three options. Here's an example of how I would do those three things if I realized a fight was becoming explosive rather than constructive. 1. Set a boundary- I will do _____ in response to ______ situation (example: I will walk away from a conversation if you start to yell at me) 2. Clarify some expectations- You can expect _____ from me, what can I expect from you? (example: I expect our conversations to be respectful, and to find mutually beneficial solutions to our problems. What do you want from this?) 3. Come to an agreement- since you want _____ and I want _____ can we do _______? (example: you want your feelings to be heard, I want to have a respectful conversation, can we take some time to gather our thoughts and come back when we aren't so heated?). These aren't easy things to learn but they do get easier the more you're committed to practicing 💜 I’m available for peer-support sessions if you want to chat about polyam/ENM, queerness, sex, love, relationships. You can schedule on my website. Link in bio ❤️💃🏻❤️💃🏻